Stealth Competitor Wonder Why You Do Not Get Rewarded - Career Pivot

Stealth Competitor Wonder Why You Do Not Get Rewarded - Career Pivot Stealth Competitor? Copyright: phoopanotpics / 123RF Stock Photo Are you a stealth competitor? If you are, you probably do not get rewarded the way you want. You may ask why? If you are really a stealth competitor then no one knows what you want. I was first to be introduced to the concept in my Birkman training. Later, I had a female client send me the book,Knowing Your Value: Women, Money, and Getting What You’re Worth byMika Brzezinski. What is a Stealth Competitor? They are typically really nice people. Their warmth is contagious. They are all for the team or, at least, that is what they say. I had one client who was a big time stealth competitor whose daughter said, “Mommy only plays games where everyone wins.” The problem is if you lose in a game… you really lose nothing. It is just a game. My client was an educator who was a wonderful team player. However… when she did not get the end-of-year recognition or award she would get really ticked off. I told her that it was not even obvious that she even wanted the award. Her response was, “You should have known.” Listen to the most recent episode She was a stealth competitor. No one had a clue that she wanted or even deserved the award because everything was for the team. Microsoft’s CEO Tells Women It’s Bad Karma to Ask For a Raise Microsoft CEO, Satya Nadella, got lambasted for his comment back in 2014: It’s not about asking for the raise, but knowing and having faith that the system will actually give you the right raises as you go along… And that, I think might be one of the additional superpowers that quite frankly women who don’t ask for a raise have. Because that’s good karma. It’ll come back because somebody’s going to know ‘that’s the kind of person that I want to trust. That’s the kind of person I want to really give more responsibility to.’ And in the long-term efficiency, things catch up.And I wonder… And I’m not saying that’s the only approach. I wonder whether taking the long-term helps solve for what might be perceived as this uncomfortable thing of ‘hey, am I getting paid right? Am I getting rewarded right?’ Because the reality is your best work is not followed with your best rewards. Your best work then has an impact, people recognize it and then you get the rewards so you have to somehow think that through, I think. This is a classic example of why we have stealth competitors. Society programs us not to ask for what we want. This is particularly true for women. They are told from their earliest ages that if you work hard and do your best you will be rewarded. Yeah, right! Knowing Your Value: Women, Money, and Getting What You’re Worth InMika Brzezinski’s book,Knowing Your Value: Women, Money, and Getting What You’re Worth, she interviewed dozens of women involved in the 2008 presidential campaign. One quote fromValerie Jarrett,Senior Advisor to President Obama and Chair of the White House Council on Women and Girls was particularly powerful. As a female and an African-American, Jarrett says she always expected to face obstacles in the workplace: “My parents raised me to think because I was a girl and because I was black I was going to work twice as hard. They did it with no chip on their shoulder â€" it was a just a fact of life, get used to it. Don’t try to change what it is, just work twice as hard.” So she says that’s what she did. She worked hard and kept her head down. But Jarrett didn’t expect that working hard would not automatically lead to advancement and better pay. “I felt like if I was deserving, then my boss should recognize that I was deserving.” â€" Valerie Jarrett Does this sound familiar? Is this a female thing? Most of the stealth competitors have been women. All of the educators I have worked with have been stealth competitors. I have had a number of men who followed the stealth competitor model. They primarily had the concept introduced that it was bad to ask for what they wanted by their father. Just like you heard fromMicrosoft CEO, Satya Nadella, it is a popular belief in our society that if you do good work, keep your head down, and stay focused on the goal you will get rewarded. Yeah, right! Understanding what you want! I wrote in my post,6 Rewards that Make Us Feel Valued at Work, most of us want 2 or 3 of these 6 rewards. They include: Mission Bonus Check Public Recognition Pat on the back from your boss Recognition from your team Pat on the back from your client If you are a stealth competitor, we have no idea what the heck you want. Therefore, most of the time you will not get rewarded the way you want. Marc Miller Like what you just read? Share it with your friends using the buttons above. Like What You Read? Get Career Pivot Insights! Check out the Repurpose Your Career Podcast Do You Need Help With ...